As he sat alone in his Aberdeen flat Scott McKenna’s head felt like it was full of broken bottles.

With his future up in the air, psychologically, he was all over the place.

The Scotland defender had just handed the club an official transfer request on the eve of their Europa League tie with Croatian side Rijeka.

McKenna had made his mind up.

After seeing bids from QPR and Nottingham Forest rejected by the Dons, he wanted out.

A year previously, even bigger offers from Celtic and Aston Villa had also been turned down.

He knew there would be a negative reaction from Aberdeen supporters.

And he knew that if he didn’t get a move to England he’d be forced to stick it out at Pittodrie.

McKenna arrives at the airport amid intense speculation over his future

But what has prevented the 22-year-old from losing his head completely - is the knowledge that he followed his heart.

Like almost every other young Scottish player, his ambition is to play in the Premier League.

He gets a buzz just from talking to international pals Andy Robertson, Ryan Fraser, Kenny McLean and John McGinn – who are excelling in the English top flight.

But for now, he’ll have to wait.

McKenna has just returned to full fitness for Aberdeen after a hamstring injury that kept him out for five weeks.

He’s now ready to kick on this season and prove exactly why he’s got so many admirers south of the border.

But as he reflects on a tumultuous summer, the big centre-back has no regrets.

Irrespective of where he hopes to be in the future, he’ll do what he’s always done since signing for the Dons at 17 - by giving everything for that red shirt.

And he says, despite what transpired back in August, no-one should ever question his commitment to Aberdeen.

In an exclusive interview with Mailsport, McKenna said: “The first year, I took all of the speculation in my stride.

“I was a young player who’d just broken into the team.

“You can’t really believe it’s happening and you don’t have time to think about things.

“But last summer was the first time where I felt a real frustration. My head was all over the place.

“I was travelling to away games with Aberdeen, not knowing what was happening with the transfer window closing.

“That was a real hard one for me. As soon as that game in Croatia was over and the window was shut, there was nothing I could do.

“Then, it was all about getting my head down, playing well and doing my very best for Aberdeen again.

“It then became a release for me because when you’re in the middle of a match, you don’t think about anything else.

“It’s more when you’re sitting in the flat yourself with a million things running through your head. You’re spinning round in circles.

“At that point, it was clear that I wanted a different challenge away from Aberdeen.

“That didn’t materialise but I still stick by the decision I made.

“I wanted to look myself in the mirror after the window closed without saying to myself: ‘I wish I’d done this or that’.

“I did what I thought was best for me at the time, without ever refusing to train or play for Aberdeen - or being an a******e about it.

“You’re always going to get criticism. I was well aware of that when I was making the decision.

“But it was something I was prepared to deal with at the time.

“And of course, I understand why fans wouldn’t be happy with a player doing that.

“But in every training session and in every game I’ve played for this club, I’ve always gave my all.”

McKenna isn’t bracing himself for more bids in January.

And he’s far too humble as a boy to take for granted that he’ll be in the Premier League any time soon.

But it won’t stop him trying to impress at the heart of McInnes’ defence.

He was gutted not to be involved in Steve Clarke’s squad for Scotland’s games with Russia and San Marino this week.

Not just because he loves nothing more than pulling on that dark blue shirt.

But also, because it gives him a chance to mix it with top players.

McKenna said: “I love going away, training with the best players.

“What I miss about not being with Scotland is sitting in the company of boys who are playing in the Premier League.

“That’s probably the end goal for a lot of young players, to go to the Premier League or via the Championship.

“It’s weird because you’ll be sitting with them as team-mates having a cup of tea and they’re just normal boys.

“Then on a Saturday night, you’ll be watching them on Match of the Day and they’re like superstars. “You realise that they’re operating at the top level against the best.

“Just to be in their company, it gives me a huge confidence boost.

“Whenever I’ve gone away with the national team, my form for Aberdeen when I get back is always pretty decent.

“It’s because of the standard of training with Scotland and that’s no disrespect to playing in the SPFL.

“I’m not sure the jump from Aberdeen to Premier League will happen for me.

“So I look at what Kenny has done, McGinn is another, who went to the Championship, got success and won promotion.

“It’s never a case of moving straight to the top level.

“At Aberdeen right now, I’ve got to prove to people in England that I’m good enough for them to take a chance on me and give me that opportunity at some point.

“The challenge for me is to stay at the level where there’s always interest in me.

“There have been bids but I can’t sit here and think it’ll just happen for me.

“It’s up to me to make sure I’m playing well because there will be another 19 or 20 year old coming through, the same way I did, and they’ll be the guy in demand.

“I need to prove that I’m worth it. And hopefully, over time, that will be good for me and Aberdeen.”

McKenna is still widely regarded as our most promising centre-backs and, arguably, he’ll be Clarke’s first choice for the national team when fit.

He’s flattered by it but it’s a mantle he wants to have.

And at 22, he’s already picked up bags of experience – on and off the pitch – which he feels has improved his mental resolve.

McKenna said: “It’s obviously great to hear that people have a high opinion of me, and they have faith in me for Scotland.

“But you can never just presume that you’re a first choice starter for the national team.

“Even when I’m fit, I always check myself to see that I’m definitely in the squad. That’s not something you can take for granted in your career.

“I’ve had a few good games for the national team but I’m sure there will be plenty people who say I could have done better.

“You can’t keep everyone happy. Fans probably believe boys at their club should be in ahead of me.

“But that’s just something you have to deal with.

“When I look back on what I’ve experienced so far at 22, it will definitely make me mentally stronger going forward.

“And that’s not even the stuff in the transfer windows. Even after a bad game you’re going to get stick.

“You have to learn to ignore it and get on with your job. And the challenge is getting back to where you were before.

“Every young player will go through tough times but it’s about how you deal with them.”